Wipe Your Nose on Me Anytime

I've always wanted to write books for children. I once wrote a story for my daughter's preschool class with about 12 hours notice of its due date, and the collaboration of mother and daughter was a touching story of a mother's frustrations with a roller-coaster workday, ending with the yummy tummy-butterflies that accompanied preschool pick-up time each day, complete with crayoned illustrations. Since then my eyes seem to be wide open to topics that translate readily...if they were only accompanied by a free-pass for the time it would take to better explore them. Laugh if you will, but one of ideas on the list is about a Mom that gets used for a multitude of services- jungle-gym, dinner napkin, chauffeur, maid, and snotty-nose tissue. While sometimes a parent's affection might be dismissed, these other services are always in demand. And for a working parent juggling so many demands, these lovingly provided favors can take on the nasty smell of burden when things get to be too much.

This morning my children allowed me to sleep in late. Oh, and I mean in. For me at least, 9:20 am is like lunch time. I got up groggily and thanked them for their returned favor. They obliged because I had promised a lazy day of pajamas, books and Wii. But after one cup of coffee, the spontaneity bug bit me and within no more than a half-hour, we were speeding along to the movie theater for a popcorn breakfast and unplanned theatrical journey. My wild things and I saw Where the Wilds Things Are, and as they munched one portion after another of salty and "buttery" goodness, I held back one salty drop after another. Maybe its PMS, but the story was incredibly touching as I saw so much of my own son in this quirky character struggling to be himself in a big, disinterested world. There were ups and downs in the film, and it would be easy enough to watch it superficially for a yuck at the monsters' body-slamming flops. But as I sat there with a snuggly, warm boy next to me, I was reminded of how significant everything we do and say as parents, or just as the big people, is in the lives of the smaller ones. I was already a fan of the screenwriters, and of the not-for-profit contributions of the one (of which my own children are the lucky benefactors), but I think I could go as far as to recommend the film as necessary viewing for any busy parent.

So today's written reminiscence is small, as I rush to get back to making the hem of my sweater available for salty, dirty, sticky, gooey love.

Excuses. Excuses. Bravo!

Rationa Liza might be my Harry Potter character name. With a dismissing flick of the wrist I'll generate a magical, unbeatable excuse for whatever I need to substantiate, rational or not. Subscribe to, or worse, buy over-the-counter, too many magazines? It's fashion research for my job. Watch too many movies (in pajamas, in bed)? It's entertainment research for my job. Getting a new cell phone? It's mobile technology research for my job.

Well, how does a girl like me rationalize my Bravo cable series addiction? When it was just Real Housewives of OC I could blame the initial home-sickness after our big cross-country move from southern California to Chicago. And when Project Runway was still connected by umbilical cable-cord to its birth-parents.....it was research. But Top Chef? (I did a catering stint with my Mom....good enough?) Flipping Out? (Don't get me started, I love this one.) The Rachel Zoe Project? This, venti-cup swigging, big-shade bearing little blondie has something to teach, and I have been her willing student from the first episode to the recent season finale earlier this week. I've even had the theme-song (see link at 42 seconds) in my head all week long (and I think I've now created my own remix in that head and if I could only get it out I might have a hit bigger than Tardy for the Party.) You may need to watch this season's episodes to follow along, but below are perhaps the top 3 management lessons to be gleaned from the show. Pay attention Rodge now that you're at the helm.

1. Don't ignore your employees

It's easy enough to get caught up in our own importance, but has Rachel really not noticed how unhappy Taylor has been? Being busy just can't be an excuse. Your people are your biggest asset and Rachel treats the dresses and accessories better than her star player. Words aren't even necessary to detect how unhappy Taylor is, or how much Brad could use a little more instruction and a little less buddy-time. (He's come so far, but when we stop teaching and learning we stop evolving.) Whether they be self-directed and self-sufficient or newbie novices, we are no longer a team when we stop communicating.

Put a little structure in place to make sure that there is ALWAYS time to communicate with your people, even for a brief time, regularly. Religiously. It might even take less time than waiting in the queue at Starbucks or fondling vintage __________ (Chanel, Halston, etc.)

2. Don't delegate big decisions that are your own to make

Sure there are learning opportunities for employees that are growing into their next role. But first giving Taylor and Brad the "opportunity" to decide which of them would forego the Paris trip, and then following this up with delegating the decision to Taylor because she is senior to Brad? Meanwhile hoping that Brad would make the "right" decision, and testing him in a contest he didn't know he was in. Tisk tisk.

Managers get to take a bigger paycheck because they get the joy of making the hard decisions (well, maybe not in the case of entrepreneurs just starting out, but you get the picture.) Involving employees in the fact- and opinion-gathering to prepare for a big decision can be a team-building experience when managed well. Delegating it is a no-no.

3. Don't not believe it can be done (at least not visibly)

How many episodes this season began with one of Rachel's "oh my god, dis-as-ter" pep-talks? The only pep was in that tall cup. I'm not advocating blind belief. But if the leader doesn't believe it can be done, and doesn't coach her team accordingly, then those laws of attraction are going to work just fine. Against them. So maybe some of this was a set-up by the producers to create tension in the show, but she shouldn't have ever given them the chance to catch those speeches on camera unless she talks in her sleep and they filmed all night long.

Your job as the leader is to create vision, manage the demand and deliver on commitments. Don't even tell yourself in the mirror that it can't be done unless you want it to not be done.

I could go on but alas my dinner is ready on this chilly Sunday evening (ok, a few more....don't play favorites by bff'ing one of them, don't disregard the input of your staff that does the real work....) So now it's out there. My MBA is from Monday Bravo Antics.

We're Out of Glue Sticks!

Oh, the gravity of the situation. Have you ever been reminded that "it's not brain surgery?" I have a six year-old that is the master of this advice. (He's also the master of the neologism, but more on this on another day, after he has signed a waiver to not sue me or register for a lifetime of therapy because of my disclosure.) If I complain of aches from sitting in a chair in front of the computer too long, driven by deadlines: "why don't you get up and take a break?" If I mention that I'm hungry: "why not have a snack, Mom?" You see the pattern. Sage little man.

Sometimes we catch ourselves at the workshop talking fast, furiously and very very seriously about something relatively important. Like, "which color tulle would make the very best fairy wing?" "Where can we possibly get the crunchiest fall leaves even though they have really just begun to fall?" Or, "We're out of glue sticks! We really need at least six more of the jumbo glue sticks. The kids love the bigger glue sticks." Certainly, we take our jobs seriously. We want to be the best at what we do and want our Wishcrafters to feel, without having to be explicitly aware of why or how we do it, our commitment to their experience. And so we find ourselves taking our purchase of cleaning products or our choice of music for the morning.....seriously. It's almost hard to use the word. But, like I said, it's relatively important. Relatively.

Every company wants a dedicated employee. And no company wants a dead employee. (Ok, well maybe the banks that take out janitor life insurance policies in an attempt to be financially creative.) So, with little Six-Year-Sage in mind, let's not implode over budgets or Olympic bids or box-office results or parking tickets or idle talk or too many buffalo-plaid shirts in the stores. I recently heard some smart grown-ups advise a group of women to be a "lighthouses". To not run up and down the shore trying to shine the lights for the incoming ships (or customers or book deal or...) Be the best little lighthouse, shining the light with verve and joy and commitment and stability. And jumbo glue sticks. The ships and the waves and the fog will still be there. Where will you be?